How to find your purpose?

What do you want to do with your life? This is a question that each person asks himself/herself at some point in time. From my experience, it’s not easy to come up with an answer to that. While growing up we try to fit with our parents and the world around it. We do it so much that we hardly realize who we truly are as a person. Many of us get lost in the cultural abyss. Many never find their way back. They become eternal puppets of things outside their control and they won’t even know it. But some of us who feel lost and not in place in this world will keep looking. This article is for those people.

Life is messy and unpredictable. I assume that most people want to be satisfied with their life. But how can you remain satisfied in this ever-changing world? In my opinion, it’s possible. It’s possible when you choose the right purpose for yourself. A purpose gives you ever long satisfaction because it reinforces your sense of being. In this world of chaos, having some direction or hope is inherently reassuring. We, humans, are unique because we control our destiny. We decide for ourselves. That is our power. Our power is that we can choose, “How do I want to live my life?”

The answer could be to live your life as it is now. The answer could be to make this world a better place or start a business or be a top executive. The answer could to find the right partner or to be a good parent or live a peaceful life. Remember, any answer is right if it ‘feels’ right to you. There is no right or wrong here. Our society tells that everyone should be rich, famous and beautiful but that is not true for everyone. We make our own meaning of the world. But, be careful of lying to yourself. Lies like I am not that smart, I am not that beautiful or I don’t have the time. They are your fears and insecurities. Don’t stay stuck in your present situation just because everything else seems hard.

Your purpose is not a choice, it’s not a wish, it’s a decision. It’s a decision of how you want to spend the rest of your time in this world and how do you make sense of this pointless existence? It’s a path you choose for yourself. It’s an announcement to the universe that no matter the circumstances, you will remain true to your purpose. But, how will you know that you have chosen the right purpose for yourself? When you have the answer, it won’t feel logical, it will feel right to you.

Your purpose requires active work towards it. Remember that your purpose is something that you can do or pursue for the rest of your life. If your purpose was to find the right partner then your purpose becomes to maintain that relationship. Interesting thing is that the world will test your resolve. You will face problems that you could have never imagined and that is the beauty of purpose. In these crazy times, your purpose will show what you want with your life and you will know what to do next.

If you want to do it right, you should take your time. Don’t rush towards a judgment. Experiment. Become a child again. Listen to your intuition. Strengthen it .Do the things you enjoy. Do it to the extremes. Break your own barriers. Meet new people. Study how people lived their lives in the past. Study how people from different countries and different sections of society live their lives. Study how different and yet same we all humans are. Find what kind of life you want, what are your core values and who do you want to be in 40 years. The more you grow yourselves, the closer you come to find yourself and the closer you come to your purpose.

Remember there are no fixed steps to finding your purpose. Don’t fall into the trap of 5-step guides or 10-step guides. Choose your action yourself. You have to find your own way and that is why having a purpose is so self-enforcing. Is it going to be hard? Yes. Will all the pain and hard work be worth it? I don’t know. I can say something fancy like ‘it’s about the journey and not the destination’ but the truth is no one knows. No one knows the future. But amidst all the uncertainty you will always know that you spent your life on what was true and important to you.

It’s easier said than done. It took me years. Years of mistakes, failed attempts, wrong assumptions about the world, and wrong assumptions about myself. But I am now sure of what I want to do and I am ready to dedicate my life to it. I hope the same for you.

P.S. I can only tell what I learned. Your journey might be entirely different. But, if there is one thing that you should take away from here is to trust yourself. And, if you are stuck somewhere or the world is too harsh on you, ask for help. You are not alone.